Three Month Check In, New Possible Situation

It’s been a while since I’ve been on here. Things at our house have been CRAZY. Travis scheduled a contest for his band every single Saturday in the month of October, and with my evening classes in another town on Tuesdays and Thursdays, it was just too much for us. I nearly crashed and burned, and I know he was eager for it all to come to an end too. We won’t schedule that much next fall. I’ve been so exhausted I could hardly think straight. Today is actually the first day in about a month I woke up feeling even slightly rested. Little slept until 8, so that’s probably why.

In about a week, we’ll have been a waiting family for three months. It’s been about a month since the last possible situation involving the baby boy due in November. Actually, he’s due today! I hope whoever that expectant mom picked is the perfect match for him, and that they’re very excited about his birth.

I’ve been so busy and overwhelmed this past month, I honestly haven’t thought much about the adoption. There were several days in a row where I didn’t even think about it. It was a pretty drastic change from just a couple of months ago, where that’s all I could think about. I don’t miss the anxiousness. I guess the acceptance of our wait just goes along with the roller coaster of adoption.

A couple of things happened yesterday that we’re praying about right now and working on. First, our agency contacted me to let me know that they want us to update our profile book. They’re asking all families to update their profile books to more professional books put together on picture websites. Our director said that birthmothers are  really responding positively to these profile books of waiting families signed with other agencies, and she doesn’t want us {or any of their families} to be overlooked based on the simplicity of the books they asked us to make. So this morning I’ve been online trying to make a book. I’m a little disappointed because it feels like a step backwards. The profile book was a huge part of our homestudy, and something I put a lot of work and effort into, and now I’m starting over from scratch.

I was also contacted yesterday about an expectant mom who had just visited with the agency and wanted to look through some family profiles. She meets what we’re looking for, but our director still wanted to check and see if we were interested in being shown to her because she’s expecting twins. Yeah, TWINS.

Part of me thinks that would be amazing and wonderful, but another part of me isn’t too excited because I’m trying to guard myself emotionally from all of the what-if’s. I guess with the first two possible situations we were contacted about, I was bouncing off the wall with excitement, but now I just realize that it’s all part of the process. Just because we’re contacted about a woman viewing our profile doesn’t mean she’s going to choose us. And there’s the fact that we have been shown to other mothers that we don’t even know about. We were only contacted about this situation because twins place a health risk on mom, which means they could be born prematurely or face time in NICU, and she wanted to be sure we were up for all of that if we were chosen.

We told her to go ahead and send her our profile. I’m just praying that God stays in control. Yes, it would be wonderful if that was all part of God’s plan for us. We’ve always wanted three children, and that would give us our three. It would be an incredible blessing and a lot of work. But, like I said, I’m not getting too excited because anything can happen. I think until we get the call that an expectant mother has picked us, I’m not going to get excited anymore. It’s smarter that way. I’m learning that looking at us isn’t choosing us.

So here’s what we know:

The babies are Hispanic, one boy and one girl. She’s due in March. She’s healthy and addiction free as far as they know, but the biological father has some serious health issues that I’d want to talk about with our pediatrician. She isn’t completely sure of her adoption choice and wants to look through some profiles to see what waiting families look like, just to get an idea of what adoption might really mean I guess. Because she’s not really picking a family right now, we may not hear anything else on this situation for a long time. I guess she could look through the family profile books and really fall in love with a family, but then again, she may still need to wrestle with her adoption decision for a while. We’ll just have to see.

So, here we are. The month of October adoption-wise was completely silent. Really that was fine with me though, because I’ve been so tired and bogged down. Hopefully now that Travis’s contest season is over and my internet class is done, things will start to settle down and I can get some sleep again. I miss sleep. That’s more on my mind than anything else.

I trust that God has something really spectacular planned with this adoption, and I just don’t feel anxious about it anymore. There isn’t anything in the world we can do {except make a new profile book I guess}, and feeling anxious doesn’t help anything. I’m blessed that right now during this insane month {worse than we’ve ever had in marching season} I  don’t have two kids! But that certainly doesn’t mean I don’t want two. I’m just glad to only have one to deal with right now 🙂

Kat

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