Tomorrow is THE meeting. The meeting we’ve been working towards and fretting over and talking about and praying for since April. Well, really, I’ve been thinking about this meeting since I first seriously started researching adoption back in January of 2010.
The “Home Study” just seems so daunting and terrifying, doesn’t it? Even the title. I think of people walking around my house carrying clip boards while their glasses slide halfway down their noses and they just scribble scribble away about the cobwebs in my kitchen. I know this isn’t accurate of course, but that’s the less than warm image the phrase conjures up.
We actually started the home study back in April when we began all of that paperwork. The home study isn’t just the home visit by the social worker. It’s basically a full survey of your life and your family. I know I’ve explained it before, but I didn’t want to mislead anyone on what exactly we’re doing here.
For those of you who believe in this sort of thing -as I do- I believe we’ve been under spiritual attack throughout this process. Between our friends not getting their faxes or emails to go through to our cat getting sick and us paying a fortune for his visit (and putting a good little nick in our finances that month) to what happened this afternoon while we were busy cleaning the house…
The power went out. We had a total blackout for several hours. Not the block or our neighbors. Just us.
Can you imagine trying to clean house with absolutely no power in 100+ degree weather? It was miserable! We had no washer or dryer, no dishwasher, no oven, no fans, no AC. UGH! I was sweating like a pig when they finally repaired the issue and restored power. I realized that we were being placed under spiritual attack in that moment.
Follow me here. I believe that when Christians are following the will of God and doing what he has called us to do, Satan steps in and interferes. He tries all kinds of things to deter, discourage or distract us. As my dear friend Micah said this afternoon, “Take joy in the fact that you wouldn’t be tested if you weren’t doing something right. Just stay focused.”
I was definitely frustrated this afternoon, but I kept my spirits up and just kept cleaning. We fell behind on laundry but I got all of the dusting done, the windows cleaned, and the toilets scrubbed. I maintained my resolve and the house looks great. I know that she isn’t judging my house as far as tidiness goes, but I just feel like I need to DO something to prepare for this meeting.
I don’t have any idea what kinds of questions exactly she might be asking, and I’m scared about the part where we’ll show her our bank statements. But cleaning is something I can control. It’s not much, and I’m certain it doesn’t really factor in (unless our house were unsafe for a child), but I need to do something.
For those of you who pray (and I would encourage anyone who doesn’t to give it a try!), please pray for us tomorrow. Pray that I am not a nervous basket case and that all goes well.
For those of you adoptive moms out there, were you nervous before your home meetings?